A NEW BOOK
BY A CAVALRY CLUB MEMBER
We
are pleased to feature a new book by one of the Cavalry Club's oldest members, Captain Jim Ottevaere. How he ever found
the time to write this thing is a mystery to all the regulars at the Club. When he wasn't in the river or in the bush, he
was sitting on the front porch drinking "Wild Turkey" Old Fashions and chewing on the end of a Cuban cigar (probably
a knock-off).
Everyone here at the Club has to admit though, that it's
a darned good book, and because the publisher let him put his name on the cover he must have somehow found the time to
get it done. Which brings up something pretty peculiar. Old Uncle Alphonse told everybody during an all night poker
game that he was the guy that did all the research and most all the writing, not Jim. He claimed that Captain Jim was
never really up to the task. Uncle Alphonse says that every time he saw ol' Jimmy at the keyboard of the Club's old computer,
he was either looking at one of those naked woman websites or he was buying something on eBay. Of course the Captain said
that it was a lie, not about the naked woman websites, he admitted to that, but about Uncle Alphonse claiming to be involved
in any way, whatsoever, in the production of the book. Captain Jim swore that he has a laptop type computer that he keeps
tucked away in his fishing bag and that is what he did the book on. Uncle Alphonse says to Jim, "only a fluffy boy would
bring a laptop to the Club and the Club doesn't allow either ladies or fluffy boys, so how did you sneak in." Captain
Jim shot back, "Everyone knows that Uncle Alphonse is so dumb that he couldn't write his own name, even
if someone printed it for him in big letters on the weather board. Adding; "So how in the hell could he have written
a whole book." That's when it got a little testy.
You can imagine what happened next, or maybe you can't,
if you haven't been to the Club. Uncle Alphonse, and a few of the drunkest boys down at one end of the lodge pulling down
"28" side-by-sides from the rack and the Captain and a few of the other retired cops digging around in their
duffels for their hide-out .38s. If it hadn't been for Lester smacking Uncle Alphonse on the back of his head with
the flat of that old Model 1860 Cavalry saber, that's stuck into one of the log rafters, and sending him on a face down skid
under the big table, there might have been some real action to patch up. But as it turned out Uncle Alphonse just fell asleep
under the table. With him out of the way everyone else cooled down pretty quick and finished up the poker game. Lester
figured that since he was the one who brought down Uncle Alphone he should get Uncle Alphonse's fairly sizable
stacks of chips. It didn't help Lester, though. He lost all his chips and Uncle Alphonse's too. Except for those
that Captain Jim skimmed. Captain Jim usually wins at poker.
